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Miscellany
Miscellany

Psychology Articles

Attachment Theory

Books:

  1. Attached (304 pages, 2012) by Levine and Heller. A nice overview of attachment theory written by two psychologists who specialize in that area. Written for laypersons. I found the first two chapters vague & boring. From Chapter 3 onwards, the book made sense to me.
  2. Handbook of Attachment (3rd Edition, 1068 pages, 2016) by Jude Cassidy (Editor), Phillip Shaver (Editor) is a definitive collection of articles by attachment theory researchers.
  3. Attachment in Adulthood (2nd Edition, 690 pages, 2016) by Mario Mikulincer and Phillip Shaver is a unified view of research related to attachment theory in adults.
  4. Attachment in Psychotherapy (366 pages, 2015) by David Wallin is written by a clinical psychologist who interweaves research, theory and mindfulness practice in this book.

Short Articles:

  1. Overview by Mark Manson is an easy read.
  2. A Brief Overview of Adult Attachment Theory and Research by Chris Fraley (2010) is a good article explaining attachment theory research in chronological order.
  3. Articles by Jeb Kinnison, author of several books: SecureAnxious PreoccupiedDismissive AvoidantFearful Avoidant
  4. Avoidant personalities: (a) Negotiating Terms: How to Date a Girl who doesn't trust anyone (written by an avoidant woman who is self aware), (b) Therapy for Trust Issues.

Online Questionnaires:

  1. Personality Testing: ECR.
  2. Chris Fraley's Online Questionnaire.
These questionnaires are based on ECR Approach.
Fear of Abandonment

Abandonment is a good article that explains how loss or unmet emotional needs in childhood trigger fear of abandonment. She's Afraid of Sex exemplifies a behavior pattern that occurs in adult relationships; an individual who has fear of abandonment is afraid of opening up, sharing their true feelings and getting intimate. Athough this article is about a woman, the problem itself occurs in both men and women.

How to Overcome the Fear of Abandonment is an excellent article. Sixteen different psychologists (15 women, 1 man) present their respective approaches in their own words.

Karpman Drama Triangle

The Relationship Triangle (Psychology Today, June 2011).

Escaping Conflict and the Karpman Drama Triangle.

The Winner's Triangle is an approach by Acey Choy. This article is succinct and insightful. It has guidelines for all 3 roles: Victim, Rescuer and Persecutor. Also explained in From Drama to Winner by Sarah Gornall (2010). This PDF explains the situation from the persective of all three parties: see the "thought bubbles" and actual statements issued by them.

The Power of TED* is said to be a great book for those playing the Victim role in their lives. It encourages them to become Creators. This book promises to be valuable. I haven't read it yet.

Addiction

Everything you think you know about addiction is wrong | Johann Hari is an excellent talk by the author of Chasing the Scream (400 pages, 2015). Johann also wrote The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think (Huffington Post, Jan 2015). Johann's main message is that drug addiction and loneliness go hand in hand. Instead of punishing and ostracizing drug addicts, we should help them get integrated into society by helping them grow connections with others.

Codependence

I couldn't find an easy read for this subject. All the books that I browsed through were written in a harsh tone, not empathetic.

Miscellaneous

Why Can't I Make Everyone Happy? is an insightful cartoon. Some of us are 'people pleasers' who instinctively try to make others happy to win their approval or affection. Such poeple tend to be Rescuers or Saviors in the Karpman Drama Triangle.

Wicked Thoughts (Psychology Today, Sep 2015). This article presents techniques for addressing unspeakable or wicked thoughts that occasionally cross our minds. The Guest House by Rumi is a poem along the same lines.

What if Age Is Nothing but a Mind-Set? (NYTimes, October 2014) is an inspiring article on how our minds affect our bodies: if we start acting like 22, we start looking like 22. Well, not exactly.. we start looking younger, happier n brighter than before. An intriguing study had "chambermaids" as subjects (Search for "chambermaids" in the article) - those who *believed* that their work was strenuous lost weight.

20 Jan 2014
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